Reviewer
Kitty |
Build-up 3 |
Kissing 4 |
Love scenes 3 |
Movie overall
3 |
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"The Hunger" is about a 2000 year old vampire, played by Catherine Deneuve, who never ages and is drop dead gorgeous. She has lovers but they never seem to last as long as her and always end up aging and aging very suddenly, and then she has to put them in a box in the attic because they don't actually die - they just get very old.
Anyway her most recent lover, a man whom she has been with for about 200 years, is just getting into the aging thing. So Catherine has decided to try something new and is asking a doctor (Susan Sarandon) for her advice to see if she can help out the boyfriend. In the end, though, she just decides to put the boyfriend in a box and hooks up with Susan instead. Go Catherine!
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Actresses:
Catherine Deneuve & Susan Sarandon
Susan is signing copies of her anti-aging book. Catherine comes up and stands by the desk. Susan suddenly looks up and says, "What did you say?" Catherine smiles and says, "Nothing." Then Catherine tells Susan that she'd like to talk to her about her book, and Susan gets all flustered and stammers that she'd like that. Catherine smiles again and leaves.
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Actresses:
Catherine Deneuve & Susan Sarandon
Susan comes to Catherine's house and rings the doorbell. She is expecting to see Catherine's husband - when Catherine answers the door, Susan recognises her from the book signing and says, "Oh!" and then "Hello." Susan starts getting embarrassed again. She asks about the husband. Catherine lies and says that he went to Switzerland - really, he just got very very old and she put him in a box in the attic, but I guess she couldn't exactly tell Susan that.
They talk for a while and Susan gives her home and office phone numbers to Catherine and says, "If you need anything, please call me!" Susan has to leave then, because Catherine has another visitor, but she seems very distracted, as most people would be around Catherine Deneuve, and in fact she almost gets hit by a truck on the way out.
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Actresses:
Catherine Deneuve & Susan Sarandon
Susan comes back to Catherine's house. She pretends to be concerned about the husband, but gives that up almost immediately and confesses, "I don't know why I'm here." Catherine lets her in. Susan pokes around in Catherine's house a bit and looks at all the knick-knacks, and they have a glass of sherry.
Later, Catherine sits down at the piano and starts playing Lakme, by Delibes. Susan has by now removed her jacket and is wandering around, chattering to Catherine. She asks her if she ever gets lonely and talks about how nice Catherine's pendant is. Catherine just sort of smiles and ignores her a bit. Susan sits down on a chair with her legs hanging over the edge and asks about the piece that Catherine is playing on the piano. Catherine tells her it's about a lady named Lakme and her slave girl who sang beautiful songs to each other. Susan says, "It sounds like a love song." Catherine says, "I told you. It was sung by two women." Susan says, "It still sounds like a love song." Catherine agrees and says that maybe that's what it is. Susan pauses and then enquires, "Are you making a pass at me [Catherine]?" Catherine, being far too poised and cool to say, "DUH!", tells her off for calling her by her full name and asks her to use just her first name, and then she answers the question and says, "Not that I'm aware of, [Susan]." Susan smiles and shakes her head, and then COMPLETELY accidentally pours the sherry onto her top and adds a very unconvincing, "Oh, nooo."
So in a few minutes, she's wiping it off with a damp cloth. Catherine comes up behind her and touches her on the back of the neck on the way past. Then Catherine sits down on a chair and puts her feet up to watch Susan undress. Susan turns around and strips off her top. Catherine stands up and comes back again to hand her something new to put on, but then she brings her hand up to Susan's shoulder, then to her neck, and then they start kissing.
Then it switches to all these soft-focus shots of them lying around on a bed, kissing and stuff, with voile sheets over them - you know the kind of thing. Susan's naked, Catherine uses a body double. Pah. Catherine gives Susan a hickey on the arm. It's an evil hickey.
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Actresses:
Catherine Deneuve & Susan Sarandon
Because of the evil hickey that Catherine gave her, Susan has now got vampire blood running through her veins. It came up on a medical test and Susan is not very happy about it. She comes and yells at Catherine about it and asks her what she did to her. Catherine just smiles smugly and acts condescending. Susan is angry and shakes her a bit, messing up Catherine's perfect hair (apparently THIS vampire can use mirrors) and giving her a little scratch on the cheek. Catherine has mighty vampire strength and booms, "ENOUGH!" and pushes her away. Susan goes stomping away out of the house. Catherine says, "You'll be back."
Susan walks around in the street for a while and tries to phone her boyfriend, to no avail. So she goes back to Catherine's house again. Catherine brings her something to eat - it's a male prostitute. Yummy. Susan lies on the bed, all sweaty and shaking from not having eaten any human blood, or something. Catherine climbs on the bed and leans over and kisses her, then tells her about the nice juicy rent boy she brought.
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Actresses:
Catherine Deneuve & Susan Sarandon
Susan didn't eat the prostitute. Instead, her boyfriend came to visit her at Catherine's house to check on her - so she ate him instead. Anyway she comes downstairs to see Catherine, who fixes her a drink and congratulates her on the loss of her blood-sucking virginity, or whatever. Susan puts her hand on Catherine's neck and kisses her. Catherine husks, "Forever and ever." They start kissing again, passionately. While Catherine is distracted by Susan kissing her, Susan stabs herself suddenly, but keeps kissing Catherine. Blood starts spurting everywhere and out of Susan's mouth. Catherine is shocked and does a little hoppity-hop thing across the floor as Susan starts falling over, but they're still kissing. Finally Susan flomps down on the floor, dying/dead and Catherine manages to detach herself from the kiss, and starts wailing and wiping blood everywhere.
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This film is so funny! It's so wonderfully tacky and cheesy that I guess you can't help but like it. Who'd have thought they would be able to get Susan Sarandon and Catherine Deneuve to do that? Also, I think this is the movie that turned Catherine Deneuve into a lesbian icon, so there'll be no complaining from me. It's one of those films that are incredibly fun to just watch and laugh at. I think that about sums it up. Oh, and I have to say - Catherine Deneuve is the most attractive vampire that I have ever seen.
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