TV Talk

'Prison Break's Wild Fall Finale

Ah, you gotta love Prison Break. Fox's loopy jailbreak yarn has more surprises than 1,000 boxes of Cracker Jack. Prison Break has become so ridiculous, so out-there it makes 24 look like a stodgy Masterpiece Theater production.

I don't care. I just strap myself in and enjoy the ride to who-knows-where.

Nice little twist at the end of last night's entertaining fall finale. I'm talking about bad agent Kellerman joining the good team (that would be the team featuring Michael and Lincoln) by shooting fellow bad agent Mahone and then boldly proclaiming he was ready to exact revenge on the dastardly President Reynolds for ruining his life.

His exact words, if memory serves, were, "You want to take the b---h down? You just found your inside man."

Hmmm...I don't know. Kellerman is a cold-blooded dude who hours earlier attempted to drown Sara in a bathtub. You know he can't be trusted. But Michael and Lincoln are smart. They know this already. And if they forget, Kellerman has a big, ol' iron burn on his chest courtesy of Sara that should remind them of how bad he can be.

Meanwhile, I howled watching Bellick getting tossed in a cell with Avocado, Tweener's former cellmate. The burly Bellick looked like a scared little kid being dropped off at school for the first time.

Tip for Bellick: Sleep with one eye open -- all dee time.

Before I forget, what was up with the mysterious Note Passing Man who seems to be calling the shots? I figured NPM didn't want to be heard barking orders while Agent Kim was on the phone, but NPM kept writing notes ("Retire Kellerman") even after Kim hung up.

Perhaps NPM's shy. Or has a squeaky, girly voice that doesn't make him sound as threatening as he looks. Or he could be proud of his world-class penmanship. Or the producers just didn't want to pay the actor playing NPM a lot of dough so they didn't give him lines.

Who knows?

Meanwhile, T-Bag is leaving a trail of dead bodies that would make both Michael Myers and Jason from the Friday the 13th movies proud.

First T-Bag offed the poor, pool-playing war vet so he could steal one of those "prosthetic jobbies." Then T-Bag wined and dined and bedded the sweet, lonely and obviously very horny postal worker so he could obtain Mrs. Hollander's address.

Now, I'm not a woman, but this is the second time T-Bag has charmed a member of the opposite sex with ease. Am I missing something? Do these women not see T'Bag's unsightly grille, tattered 'do, one hooded eye, and that butt-ugly hoodie he's always wearing?

Ladies, help me out here.

What's the appeal?

Prison Break's fall finale was certainly appealing. Can't wait 'til Jan. 22.